Edmund's Poem: Stitch
Stitch
My bewildering past came
running toward me like a
sonic boom, as my spindle world
unraveled to reveal
the spiky, thick, and pointy
history of my life.
this impeccable imperfection was a welcome stitch.
The branch of a pathway that I have taken
to experience the agony, anger, and dismay
lead me to a road of crackling.
Fiery. Understatement.
And finally, sizzle.
There is some light
That escalates down to this thundering ground
Jar of dirt.
The light prays so hard that even Jesus couldn’t bring himself back up to heaven
I become part of the Nanking war between China and Japan -
A war that never turns into termination -
And I pray as high as the lord does that my family members will survive.
However
I didn’t mean to start all of the terror in the world’s past
I didn’t know I hurt anyone
It’s as if I tossed a nuclear atom bomb to someone
Because all those Japanese internship camps that happened
Never affected me anyway
But if you are mad at me
And full of antipathy
From desk to desk
From Chinatown to Englewood
Then you may or may not
Realize
That you could be the one with purity
Yet I am the one with a life that has stitches on it.
Your poem opened the door on your life and let us know about things in the past.
ReplyDeletei liked it but didnt understand alot of what you where saying like naniking and desk to desk china town englewood
ReplyDeletei idnt understand your poem becasue you talked about some randome stuff but it still was god.
ReplyDeleteThis poem was really deep, and I don't know what you meant by stitches, and some parts I didn't get, but I liked how you expressed what you felt about your life. Good job.
ReplyDeletethat was a really good poem edmund. I thought that your poem was really interesting and involved part of your past so good job.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really interesting, as it gives a new side of you. I always knew you as that kid who said random stupid stuff, yet this poem shines a light on an entirely different side of you
ReplyDeleteI didn't really understand this poem it seemed to have been about you and personal experiences.
ReplyDeleteI feel as if this is about the class because you mentioned 'desk to desk' and the Englewood and Chinatown part and i just think thats really cool. Nice job =)
ReplyDeleteThis was so stunning! I loved how you described your past as if you were in it, and as if it was against you. You helping people see your world, and I think that you have a lot to teach us in this poem. It was well written and your video was a nice touch. The last stanza was so amazing. Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteYour poem was great. You shared a part of yourself and the way that you experience the world. Thanks for sharing it, you seem very passionate about your own culture.
ReplyDeleteThis was a great poem. The constant intense word usage was interesting, but I couldn't really understand what this poem was about until you described it more in the final couple stanzas. I thought this poem and topic is very personal to you, and though I do not entirely understand the topic, I think your presentation was excellent, great work Edmund!
ReplyDeleteGreat poem! The confusion you speak of is something not many people talk about in Western culture, so I thought it was really interesting to hear this new topic. The video helped add imagery and capture attention. Good job!
ReplyDeleteI liked your poem and how it mentioned a fight between Japan and China. I also liked how your video went along with different parts of your poem. I also liked how you ended the poem saying how your life had the metaphorical stitches on it. It was good and I feel like it really described your identity. I didn't really know this about you but your poem really showed a new side of you.
ReplyDeleteEdmund, I feel like I need a bit more time with your poem, and perhaps some context, to more fully comprehend it, but I really appreciate your choice of words and use of multimodal video. I like the variation of spacing, punctuation, etc. that you use to emphasize different words and ideas--you are clearly engaging in word play, an important (and fun) aspect of poetry.
ReplyDeleteEdmund, this poem told us a story of your family's past and how past generations have been through a lot. I can really connect to this and i think everyone because we are all from different places and have distinct cultural backgrounds. I like the way you connected this with yourself today and say you are full of stitches.
ReplyDeleteI liked your poem a lot. It had a great use of many metaphors and talked about a struggle in the past. It also referenced a lot of things and I liked the constant figurative language.
ReplyDeleteYour poem was really good! I liked how you compared your life now to what happened in the past to your culture. You compared the Vietnam war (I think) to how your life is. It also tells a story of your cultural background. Everyone has different experiences on things and I like the way you presented this poem. You gave us a little history lesson there! You did a good job!
ReplyDeleteThis poem was great and I like how you included the chinatown V.S inglewood discussion to the poem this gave me a backround of you and what happened in your history. I never realized that this side of you was there and the history of japan was kind of unknown to me at least. the movie was very in sync with your speaking.
ReplyDeleteEdmund, this was a really good poem that reveals a lot about you and your family's past. Although I didn't understand the references that you made, I feel like that it made your poem more personal to you. Your multi-modal component went really well with your poem. I liked the message that your poem conveyed. Overall, your spoken word was put together really well and you did an amazing job!
ReplyDeletei love how you brought in the talk we had in class nice job
ReplyDeleteI like how you added your thoughts and the discussions we had in school into this poem, it brought more of a personal aspect to this. Your multi modal component is different than anyone else's I have seen so far, so nice job with the creativity. I also like how you brought up the war between Japan and China, this really uncovers your identity and I got to see a side of you that I have not seen before, great job!
ReplyDelete